Fairies Fairies Everywhere.

Since we are still on the subject on gym, have you ever met some guys whose usual modus opreandi is to move in a group? Ok, I guess you have heard of gym bunnies, or gym chasers or any sort of gym related people who are part and parcel of the world of gym-ming.

We see those who go for classes (usually they will hog to be the first in lines), those who work out together (these macho hunky "konon") and then will huff and puff as they pull those weights? Or those who will hog the treadmills and then end up walking at a pace of a speed of 3 or 3.5? Then there is this group who run along and hop not like bunnies but more like fairies in the gym.

Yes, my subject is on this part of community who incidently belongs to where I also hold a stake in. Not that I was incorporated in it, I was a born stakeholder but then again, as they say, we are all diverse in our thoughts and mannerisms. This is what makes our community colorful, yes but, then again, shouldn't this colorful rainbow be controlled when its near the general population?

These gym fairies whom I shall name them are those who I will call them "mui mui chais" (Cantonese for little sisters). They consists of students from colleges or even maybe doing their Pre-U or A-levels. Again, this enlightment came about last week when I was doing my weights religiously at one obscure corner, not making the huffs and puffs, trying very hard to camaflouge myself and hoping to end my sets at the appropriate time.

But, this was not to be for my peace was broken when I heard a shrill in the gym, yes, right smack down in the gym. I turned around and saw this group of gym fairies grouping around a fellow member who was their FH (fag hag); obviously not seen in many moons and they were all excited like little girls getting their first Barbie sets.

They acted as the whole gym belonged to them oblivious to the other gym users. Never once did they consider that there were other groups there too, who may not tolerate this kind of actions. No, they acted in defiance and there they were exchanging kisses and what not.

Not to be outdone, their audio can fight the in-music system played in the gym.

"How are you my darling" said the head of the gym fairy.

"I'm good" the FH shrilled.

"Long time no see, you look so fab" another member of the gym fairy voiced out.

And the chatter went on and on, and occassionally there were a shrieking laughter. And this laughter was not from the FH but a member of the gym fairy who could not contain his excitment as if he had just reached nirvana there and then.

If this was not enough, another group joined them. This group looked like they were the gym fairies wannabe.

They did not look like the age range I mentioned earlier but were much older than them, perhaps the graduated ones? But, as you graduate you move on, nope, they stayed at that level, as I noticed.

So this went one for another good 15 minutes and what really irked me was that they were parked in the middle of the aisle where the stairs meet the landing, a major walkway for those who want to go to the lockers, drinks stalls or the studio. Lack of common courtesy seem to prevail in this group and as I had finished my sets, I walked up to the locker and said my P&Qs before they eventually made some way for me to go up.

I'm not against these group of gym fairies but then again, shouldn't there be some form of decorum when they meet up? Already, our image out there is already bruised and stereotyped in many ways, I was at least hoping that these group of up and coming community members, can contribute more positively. Looking at the scenario, it seems we have not reached to that level.

My blog is not intended to preach against anyone but to voice out my own views that if one wants to act as they see fit, then go ahead. However, we are not living in the States where they have the First Amendment to protect them. Here, we are a minority group, a group that eventually does not have any political nor an organized consensus movement to back us up, but rather, we are all individuals in our own, blending in and trying to be what we are definitely are not.

Therefore, act as you think its in you, do not lie about it but...act cautiously as this world does not owe us anything neither do we own this world. We all share and live together, so lets have some control, common courtesy and a sense of responsibility when we are out there. By building our positive image is better than having it soiled all in a good half hour of meeting in the middle of the aisle of a local gym.

Funny Thing That Happened...

When you go and shower, do you also tend to clear your nostrils at the same time? I mean, its possible for some people who do it naturally after all they are cleaning their part of the body and the nostrils are also considered part of it and therefore, deserves a good clean up too.

Actually how does one clean their nostrils or nose for this matter? Do they use their fingers as how they would normally do when they presumably think they are alone and use that index or whichever fingers that are available to "dig up the gold" as they would say.

However for me, this incident happened one evening last Thursday when I was in the gym. I go to the nearest but for me, I find the FF branch in Manulife based in Damansara Heights to be my favorite haunt. Based on several reasons and one of the reasons is that I find it comfortable, so I guess that is a good reason for me to go there almost anytime I find the urge and need to do so.

After going through my regular regime, I would usually shower and head back home for dinner. As I went to my locker to take my towel and toiletries, there was this noisy sound coming from the shower stalls.

It sounded like a engine gone all wrong. The sound was getting louder by the seconds as if there was a crescendo note hitting the highest note that can found. But, it was seriously all wrong...because, the notes were irritating. It never stopped, it went on and on as if the engine caught stuck or seriously in my mind, I was thinking this guy whoever he was, had a jolly fun time doing that.

Ok, its hard to imagine how one can create such sounds, right? Try to blow your nose hard and what sound comes out? Usually for normal people, its a polite soft billowing sound, but for this unnatural guy, it was an engine. Alright, I have heard of perverts having jolly fun time doing things but this was really out of our league.

The best part of this is, it seems that this guy has a certain wave towards making all those "sneezing" sounds. There were times it was soft, then became louder and then returned to it original form, soft. Even the other gym members who were at the lockers snickered amongst themselves of this little amusement we encountered.

So, if you ever do clear your nose the next time, please remember its not your own private toilet you have there. Do it more civil like but then again, there are exhibitionist and there are exhibitionists of all kinds.

A JOURNEY REVEALED (part FOUR)

Date : October 29, 2006
Place: Where else

The most dreaded time of the day is when the staff nurses will come to do the dressing, and that sort of made me not sleep the whole night. It never crossed my mind to actually think I would be afraid of such a thing as something innocent called "dressing".

As I sat there after breakfast, waiting for the nurses to take off the bandage and then usher me to shower, I began to conjure up all the worst possible scenarios that might take place. I believe that if one was to conjure them up on this basis, things might not turn out to be so bad after all. But, then again, I always wondered if this theory worked?

The staff nurse approached me and told me if I was ready for my shower. I told her, yeah, I'm ready.
She went into the toilet and began to prepare my sitz bath for me. At the same time, I began to muster up all of my strenght to counter the possible pain that might crop up; and at the same time felt nervous. Hands were perspiring but I kept that in check.

Soon, she came over and asked me to bend down. I did as I was told.

"I'm sorry sir, its going to hurt a bit, I will try to be gentle" said the nurse as she proceeded to tear up the bandage. With one pull, she did it and ouch, it hurt but not as bad as yesterday. The pain was still evident.

After my shower, I sat down in my bed, my energy thoroughly drained the other day seemed to appear to have come back. As I listened to the goings on next to me, I realized Sunday mass was going on. I ventured to the window to have a peek and there it was the usual crowd mingling to go into church. It was packed and it was a also a special sunday as it was the first holy communion for about 80 children. (for the uninitiated, first holy communion is given to kids as they became of age 7 or 8) Its usually a big celebration in the Catholic church as this tradition emphasizes the child's needs to be a follower of Christ and to inform that he or she is able to participate in the Sarcarments of the church.

A tinge of sadness did hit my heart; began to think, it I took more care of my health, I would not end up in a hospital on sunday and furthermore, I would be able to attend church. But, as it is, the evident had happened, so I guess I have live with it.

Suddenly I hear my name being called. I saw the nurse coming up with the dressing sets. My heart sank, there there, I told myself, brace for it and don't be afraid. After all, I'm a MAN, so no need to be all pussy about it. Obidently, I went back to my bed. I lay there waiting for the nurse. Another nurse came in, pulled the curtains to add some privacy around my bed.

The nurse started with her what I called them rituals. There she opened this plastic casing that consisted of items like wool, clippers, a tray and a syringe. She then proceeded to put on a hand glove and continued with her act. Then she poured some saline and some hydrogen peroxide (I think) on to the dish and then proceeded to tear out the cotton wool one by one.

After tearing them, she will go through a motion and then dip a bit of the wool in the saline and then squezze it using the clippers. All these actions actually gave me some entertainment before I was tortured. Not that I really like to be in that situation, but I really had no choice, it was thrust onto me; like it or not, this was the sort of thing I had to live with while the wound was being healed.

"Sir, I'm going to proceed now, you may want to push the button for the painkillers" the nurse told me.

I quickly took that order with much gusto, as I did not want to encounter that same pain I had yesterday.

The nurse did it very delicately and patiently too. I felt the pain, it was a stinging pain but to tell the truth, I did find the pain killers doing their job, that is, immunized me from the pain. Nope, I still felt that pain of an open wound. Each time the wool went in, I felt like screaming but surprisingly, when she did it onto my left side, the pain was not that strong.

Whole ritual lasted for an hour, I swore but it was only a few minutes and during that time too, I was sweating profusely. When it was over, I was relieved and was like looking forward that I don't have to repeat this anymore...yeah, fat chance!

Soon, the days began to pass by. One by one the other patients discharged. The first to be discharged was the uncle next to me, then followed by Mahendran and then finally the guy who works in the restaurant (who had hepatitis A). In between, another two guys came in. One was a malay chap who had a slight discomfort whilst urinating. Doctor diagnosed him as having stones in his bladder but as it was very small, he was given some medicine and then discharged the next day.

The other guy, a chinese guy, came in the same time as the malay guy but much earlier. He was suspected to have dengue and poor chap who looked normal during the day, can have his health deterriorated just like that the very next hour. His blood was checked almost daily and he looked so skinny that I actually felt a tinge of pity for him.

As the other guys discharged, I was kinda missed them because even though it was only a few days of room sharing, I sort of had this little camadrie with the guy opposite of me. I guess I was amazed at the number of visitors Mahendran used to have all through the days.

It was like his whole clan came down just to give him support. I sort of envied him because he had so many people to care for him and look at poor me, most of the time I was not filled with volume. Perhaps, I was just being too free and thought of such things.

Funny thing though, when one is alone, one really thinks a lot. Yeah, the television plays a part to divert my boredom, but then again, after a while, how much of programmes can one watch on the telly?

Days went by, my wounds healed a bit more, like no more pain from the dressings. The pain killer was taken off by my request as I did not like having to drag this post with me all the time. It impeded my freedom to walk anywhere or do anything I wanted.

Exactly 9 days, that Mawar Room, Room 6, Bed 3 became my temproray home. In that total span of 9 days, I made some company and the nurses was so friendly and they took the initiative to talk to you. They were busy but whenever they had the chance, they would make sure I was not feeling too lonely.

November 3rd, 2006 - Mr MMS gave me the green light to go home. Actually, I had the option to returning home earlier but I chose to stay back as I still needed daily dressing. Even after I got discharged, I was still asked to go back to the hospital to do the dressing.


I followed as instructed and on November 8, I went for a last check up by Mr MMS. He finally gave me the all clear and told me that I do not need to see him nor come back to the hospital for the dressings anymore

Hearing those words, made me so relieved. I was happy and could not contain my joy too. The pain had indeed gone. I can walk properly, BO properly and also sit properly. However, during this period until the 27, I will watch carefully my diet and also at the same time, to avoid all spicy food. At the same time, I have been consuming more vegetables, fish, pork and fruits. These are all cooked without any spicy ingredients. Water has been consumed almost daily (to ensure that I do not have this same problem anymore) and just last Tuesday, I went to the gym to work out, doing light exercises.

I plan to work out to gain back what I have lost and will be contended once again when my body reaches full optimum to the toned state that I used to have.

Looking back, I realized I have learned to be more humble, don't take things too seriously and let life goes as it goes. I learnt to hang loose. And, my faith increased during those trying times. I ever wondered why during these life threatening times, we always seek God for all his comfort. I realized that He has been there and the fault lies in me for I did not allow His presence to premeate in fully.

Learning from that experience, I have thanked God and his saints for the marvellous things I have learnt, the family and friends who have surrounded me and the staff at the hospital. They truly inspired me to learn and give more and I have told myself that I want to pay back for all this wonderful blessings I have gained from here. The pain, the struggles and the eventual sweet recovery, this were all part of living that we have to go through. I mean I look back and see things differently now, I guess I have been reformed from this whole harrowing experience.

Thank the good Lord for His guidance and love all throughout the time. I learnt that this pain came with a purpose and that purpose is now set to be my goal to move on with the rest of my journey. Thus, a grateful heart is how I feel at the moment!

A JOURNEY REVEALED (part THREE)

Date: October 28, 2006
Place: Mawar Ward, Rm 6-3
Time: 0730 hours.

Another new day dawns around my new "home". The bells from the Assumption church began toiling around 0600 hours and that sort of broke my sleep. Within minutes, the church was abuzz with the choir and Mass for the day began. As I lay there, I could hear the prayers said by the priest and the congregation that followed it.

In between, I believe I dozed off before woken up by the shuffling of the feats of the nurses around the ward. The first thing according to their routine will be to take the patient's blood pressure, temperature and the pulse. All this was done religiously every morning, afternoon and evening. Data will be collected and recorded in the patient's chart. Some of the lines drawn looks like our local KLCI bourse. Ups and downs but for me it was moderate, not much of ups mostly median line, which was good news.

Breakfast was served, I had two slices of bread with butter and jam and a cup of Milo. Again, the feeling from the anasthestic was there but thank goodness not that strong as it was yesterday. I managed to gulp down the Milo and ate the bread with relish, as if this was the proper meal of the day unlike yesterday which I had force feed myself.

Immediately after breakfast, the nurses came in to change the bed sheets and the pillow cases. Again, this was a routine done almost daily which I thought was not bad comparing to Govt. hospitals which I believe did not practice this (or I may be wrong).

After changing, the nurses told me that they will take off the dressing and I will have to BO (bowel open or pass motion) and after doing that, to have my sitz bath. I was like huh? Sitz bath? I thought that this action will be assisted by the nurses and I kind of felt worried. Nothing of that sort mind you, but the thought of another person who was not of the same sex trying to give me a bath? I wanted to protest but then I did not voice out anything because I did not know what a sitz bath was all about.

So a stiz bath is where warm water mixed with salt is passed through a long tube and one sits in it. The term sitz bath comes from the German word "sitzen" which means to sit. Its supposed to be ease discomfort in the rectum area and at the same time acts as a disinfectant for the rectum/ anus area. (http://www.healthatoz.com/healthatoz/Atoz/common/standard/transform.jsp?requestURI=/healthatoz/Atoz/ency/sitz_bath.jsp)

The feeling one feels sitting on it is strange for the beginners as this warm gushing water will come down from the tube and a sort of fountain like effect happens and this is aimed at the anus area. (one can also control the flow by a switch like attached to the tube) Feeling is like comfortable because of the warm water and then it really soothes the rectum area. Good for those who have constipation problems too as it really eases the bowel movement .

Before I can enjoy all that, I had to have my dressing taken off. I was surprised that Mr. MMS was up at my ward that morning, followed by a staff nurse and two nurses. As they were peeling of the dressing, I cried in PAIN, pain because each time the sticthes came off, it felt as if my whole skin went with it. I cried out quite loud too because I really could not stand it.

The nurses told me to push the pain killer button to allow for the pain killers to take effect but it was no use. The pain killers this time failed in their tasks. I felt so much pain that I just did not know what to say or do except to cry out in pain. I know it was embarrasing but no choice, it was a stinging pain. Just so remember when you have a cut wound, just add salt on it and then this is the sort of pain I felt in me. I nearly fainted out of exhaustion as the nurses struggled and Mr MMS was there and I believe that he took over after that. With one pull, the whole dressing with the kaltostat (http://www.dressings.org/Dressings/kaltosta.html) came out.

"The pain is there because for the first day, it has to be tight" explained Mr MMS.

I nodded but I was happy it ended there.

"Get some hydrogen peroxide to clear it and also for the subsequent dressings, make sure that its not too tight, make it loose" ordered Mr MMS to the staff nurses.

With that, I ventured to the toilet to have my BO, sitz bath and shower. I did not BO that day as nothing came out (remember I was fasting and did not have any appetite). So, I took to the sitz bath, when the saline touched my nerve skin, it was another painful sensation. Somethng to the effect of ant bite this time. I sat there for a good 15 minutes to have it sterilize my wound area. After that, I proceeded to shower making sure I did not touch my wound as it was still an open wound and like any wound, touching any sort of material be it water in this case, it will cause me to feel a tinge of pain again.

Putting on some new clothes made me feel refreshed for a while but not for long as the nurse came promptly to do my dressing. One needs to have a daily dressing as the nurse will clean the wound and then apply kaltostat on it to ensure that the wound close faster and heal better.

"Sir, this is going to a bit painful, so I would recommend you to press the pain killer button so that the pain killer can flow into your blood and you will not feel any pain at all" the nurse told me.

Scared of the earlier incident, I pressed so many times thinking that it will help me. But, alas, this was not to be. I can still feel the pain. Each time the nurse uses a wool to administer into the wound, I felt the pain creeping. I had to cringe my fist and at times to stop the pain, I bit my pillow so hard just so that I can deviate my mind from the thought of the nurse doing the dressing.

For the 1st day, the dressing was longer than usual. The wound was obviously very huge and the more the nurse cleaned it, the more agony I felt. At last, she ended her actions and then put on a gauze on it. The gauze will act as a plaster in this sense to cover the wound area. At the same time, it will also hold the kaltostat firmly, ensuring a speedy recovery.

After the whole ordeal of the day ended, I rested in my bed thinking what more can happen. I pressed more pain killers in but not knowing that the side effect for this was again going to cause me to have a nausea feeling A nurse came to explain to me about this later and she also told me that they have a pill to counter this feeling. Talk about counter effects, they have it all.

Later on, family members, friends and colleagues dropped by. The highlight of the day was my mom's soup, Loh Hon Koh with freeze dried vegetables. I drank the soup with relish as that was the only dish that tasted not bland. It had the right taste I wanted. Apparently, after drinking it, my appettie sort of came back or perhaps I was just plain hungry.

As night crept along, I began to fall under an intense pressure thinking of my dressing and also the urge to have my BO. I know only to well, that if I still don't have a normal BO for the next few days, I believe somthing bad is brewing but knowing me, the devil as myself, I usually put myself into negative territory almost immediately. I felt a shiver thinking of tomorrow....sleep was not favorable at all and the fact, was, I wanted to go home... (to be continued)

A JOURNEY REVEALED (part TWO)

Date : October 27, 2006.
Place: Mawar Ward, 6-3.
Time: Between 0800 to the whole afternoon.

At about 8am, the caterers came in to bring the breakfast for the other patients; except for me and uncle next bed, we were both fasting due to our surgeries later. The nurse came in to greet me, asked how I was feeling, told her as a matter of fact, I felt lousy!

She smiled, and then asked me to have my shower. I was like huh? How to have shower with all the drips and tubes running around me? So, like any pro, the staff nurse managed it and soon, I was able to make my way to the toilet.

I was impressed with the shower head, it had one of those modern shower heads where one can adjust to the different types of water gushing out. Apparently, I was taking a wee bit of time in the toilet than my normal days. It was refreshing, having the warm shower hitting my otherwise sullen skin.

After my shower, I was asked to rest whilst the student nurses began to take my heart beat, blood pressure and also temperature. All this was to ensure that I was normal before my scope and also surgery later. I was normal as the student nurse dutifully informed me.

Not sure how long I was lying in bed but later I believe around 10-ish, the staff nurse informed me that they will be taking me down for my scope. She asked me if I had any valuable items with me as the ward has a safety box to keep my stuff. I told her that I have only a handphone and handed it to her. She issued me a receipt and I waited.

Minutes later, the staff nurse came and took off the drips for me as I was ushered to the wheel chair once again to be taken down to the scope room. At this point of time, my bumps near my rectum really hurt and walking was near impossible. I just cringed in pain and as they say "tahan" it like there was no tomorrow.

Soon, I was in the room, one of the nurses asked me to go up the bed and rest. Within seconds, I was pushed in with the bed to the scope room. From what I observed, the room was kinda small, there was a this huge screen next to me, which I believe was to observe what was going inside of me. There were a heart detector there, the nurse placed one of it to my index finger and soon, I could see my heart beat beeping away. Very standard Grey Anatomy's operating theater.


"We are going to put you to rest now" the nurse explained to me. How did they do it? Ok, they had this tubes again, and they actually inserted one of the tubes to my hand and suddenly I felt as if I was conscious and at the same time, maybe I was dreaming. The last thing I remembered was they asked me to lay one side and heard a grilling sound, maybe the scope was in action?
I'm not sure.

What they did was enter this contraception via my anus and from there they moved along my colon area to view what was going inside of me. According to a relative of mine, this method is very useful to check for any diseases in one's body.

After that, things began to be hazy and then it began to be clear. I woke up hearing voices and this nurse standing next to me. From my observation, I could see a few other patients in the recovery room, perhaps waiting for their turn on the scope or perhaps just after it? I'm not sure. I felt drugged.

Later, they moved me back to the ward. I believe that I went down to the scope room around 10-ish and by the time, I got back was almost noon. As I lied in bed, I felt no pain, so the pain killers did their job very well. Half an hour after that, I was again ushered out, this time in a bed.

Like those movies / dramas one has always seen, yeah, I was placed in one of them. They pushed me to the Operating Theatre and before I got know anything, a certain Dr. Hoo introduced himself to me. He told me that he was going to do the anathestic on me and asked me to relax.

The OT looked like any OT one can see in dramas or movies. Standard procedure in it and the number of nurses and doctors in there. Yeah, they all wore this green over coat and then had this green shower cap on them...oh yes, not forgetting their masks.

Dr. Hoo then injected some liquid into my tube again and then later, a staff nurse told me to inhale the oxygen when she applied the contraception over my mouth. I breathed in and out and soon, everything became a BLANK.

Imagine you like some guy / girl and you have this with you, all the vices in the world will be at your disposal. It really worked wonders as for me, I always wondered about those movies where you have people put under anasthestic, and how it felt. First hand information, your mind is a blank and what the doctors may or may not done to you, you feel nothing.

Later, I woke up to some noises. On my right, I heard this man complaining to the nurse that he was put on catheter. Left side, a little girl was crying non-stop and I believe the nurse was comforting her by calling her, Geraldine.

I looked up and then I realized I was very warm as there was a blanket put on me.

"Why is it so hot?" I asked with barely any strength in me.

"You were shivering in the OT just now" replied the staff nurse assigned to me.

"Huh? You mean the surgery is over? I thought that I'm still waiting in line for my turn?" I enquired.

"Oh no, the surgery is over an hour ago" and the nurse began to motion to the helpers to push me back to the ward.

Again, it was hazy. I was unsure what time I finished my surgery but I do believe it was already mid afternoon, somewhere around the region of 3 to 4 plus? My brother told me later that he was at the ward around 2 but at that time, I was already pushed in the OT.

Later on, Ken came to visit me but I was not sure because the effects of the anesthesia was beginning to wear off. I felt nausea and burping all the time. In one word, it was like a hangover but more worse than one. I did not get any headache, but I felt wanting to burp out air or maybe vomit, but I did not.

So the time passed, some of my colleagues came in to visit me, I was not in the mood to entertain. I wanted to say out loud their names, but I could not. I just did not have the strength. The more exertion I made, the more I felt like vomiting. I held back all of my exertions.

The nurses came in periodically to take my temperature, blood pressure and also heart beat. They wanted to ensure that all was well with me. I could feel a bandage at a certain somewhere but as for the pain, nope, I did not feel a thing; the painkillers did a magnificent job at concealing the pain.

When it was time to eat, I really did not have the appetite. They serve me porridge and some fish and vegetables. The food tasted bland, it was horrible porridge and I was feeling nausea. I forced fed myself a bit of the food, so that I can have some strength but I could not bring myself to mouth another two more spoons and I gave up. Later, when they brought in the milo for me, I did not have any appetite to drink it.
I just felt like sleeping all the time.

My friends who came in later enquired how I felt. I told them with what I had in me about my experiences and then when it was too much for me to bear, I just kept very silent. I then rested and found myself falling asleep but not without being woken up again from the nurses who wanted to check on my condition.

Another day of events have ended and tomorrow what I had expected to be smooth was not to be. (To be continued....)

Of Pus, Piles, Scopes, Anal Throbs, Surgery, Dressing & Rehabilition - A JOURNEY REVEALED (part ONE)

The whole of the Raya Holidays have been a pain in the butt for me, physically speaking. There were never a moment which I felt like I was going to die any moment or even contemplating that my life be snapped off just like that. That was the extend of how painful it was getting on to me. Sitting, walking and even sleeping was normal activities that we all participate daily but to me, it was a chore. A painful chore!

Apart from that, I was thinking of how much delicious food I was missing, as I thought since I have so much problem in BO (bowel open) or in layman's terms, passing motion, I had to restrict my diet to just soft veggies, fish and soup. After that, mostly, had to drink heaps of water and also eat fruits but all this will not help 'cause my BO movements were still constricted with the pain from the sides of my anus.

That night, I decide to go to the specialist first thing I got an appointment to see a certain Mr. MMS . I have been going to this specialist clinic located in Assunta Hospital. http://www.assunta.com.my/
for some time now for follow up checks. The last few checks did not reveal anything but now, the evidence has surfaced. Suffice to say, this was the best time to analyze what was actually going on with me?

Date: October 26, 2006
Place: Specialist Clinic, Assunta Hospital.
Time: 1430 hours.

I arrived at the Room 8 Specialist clinic approximately 1430hours. The nurse who is now so familiar with me, took my report and shoved it into the specialist's room immediately. She could tell from my face I was in pain.

Having said that, there was supposed to be another guy who was before me, but he walked away. The nurse called his name out but no answer, and seeing me there all forlorn and in agony, she ushered me in instead.

"Mr coolgardy, what seems to be the problem this time?" enquired Mr. MMS.

"Sir, the pain, it has grown worse from my last visit. It has affected my walking, sitting and now the pain is really unbearable", I replied.

"Let's have a look at it, go over the examination bed" ordered Mr. MMS.

Obidently, I walked over there, took off my pants and lay there on one side until the good Mr came in. I told him that there were puss in my motion and he took some contracption and throbbed into my ass, all this time, telling me to relax.

I felt no relaxation and I felt as if I was defiled on that bed. But, this was just an examination.

"Yes, it looks like there is puss coming out and there seem to be a two bumps on each side of your buttock bordering the anus and the leg" explained Mr. MMS.

He added " let's get you admitted" and ordered me back to his table. As I sat there, Mr. MMS told me that he will do a scope to pinpoint exactly whats happening in my rectum / colon area. At the same time, surgery will be performed and at the same time, samples of blood, urine and faeces will be taken for examination for all kinds of other diseases.

In the meantime, the staff nurse helped Mr. MMS to prepare some documents which needed my signature. Later, I learnt that those documents were acually giving consent to the doctor on surgery and any other liabilities that may occur if anything happens. This will indeminfy the doctors from any counter law suits. Standard procedures in all hospitals before any major or minor surgery takes place.

After getting all the paper work done, I was ushered out in a wheel chair to the Admissions Dept. where I was to be admitted. I got hold of my brother and told him to return home first and get my stuff while I will wait for them to admit me in.

So, I was there waiting for the next few minutes and minutes became half an hour, so I got a bit impatience.

"Is there any problem with my insurance coverage" I asked this nice Indian chap who was manning my admisson forms.

"No, just that we are waiting for the Guarantee Letter from the Insurance company before proceeding with the admissions" he replied.

"Its taking quite some time" in an impatient voice. Then, I took my mobile, called up Asia Assistance Network which is handling the insurance under Mitsumi Sumitomo Insurance.

"Hi, whom am I speaking to?" I demanded.

"Lek Lin here" the girl over the phone replied.

"Well, I'm so and so here and I like to know if there is any problems concerning my Insurance GL? Look, I'm in pain here and its not a very nice situation to be sitting in a wheel chair and I really hope you guys will just speed up whatever you are processing there! I cannot be waiting for almost an hour, I could have just died here!" I retorted.

"Sir, sorry for this inconvenience, the GL will be ready and faxed over in 10 minutes" assured Lek Lin.

So, without wanting to pursue this conversation anymore, I hung up and waited for another 10 minutes But, it took shorter than that. I believe after my call, they quickly faxed over the GL and once they received it, immediately the Admissions officers did the usual processing.

Now, I thought to myself, I can lie down in bed but this was not to be. Horrors to horrors, the bed's not ready yet so I had to wait for another hour or so for them to finally clean up and make up the bed. I was thinking, wow, what an adventure.

"Why don't you rest in our treatment room" the nice Indian chap advised.

"Ok, but please get them to hurry up" I replied.

I was then wheeled to the treatment room which is actually the A&E section. I was placed at one end of the bed and the curtains drawn a bit for my privacy. The bed was hard, the pillow not soft at all, and best thing, I had to endure cries from little children who was obviously in pain getting their treatments or dressings sorted out.

Tried as I best to close my eyes, I could not. I know the voices around me were overwhelming but I did manage to get some shut eye for a minute or so, I guess.

"Sir, wake up, your bed is ready, I will now bring you up to Mawar Ward, at 4th Floor, Room 6, Bed 3" answered the Indian chap.

Making my way up to the ward, I noticed that the time has already crept to almost 1855hours. Wow, from 1430 hours to 1855 hours, thats like almost more than 2 hours of waiting for my bed. Never mind, I thought to myself, at least I have a bed and will get my pain off for once and for all.

Place: Mawar Ward, Room 6, Bed 3, Level 4.

My bed was placed next to the window. There are altogether 4 beds in that room. The guy next to me was an old uncle (age 78) who came in to the hospital because he fell from his roof and thankfully for him, his fall was broken by a mattress. So, now he has fractured his arm and bit of his leg but over all, he was well and hearty. I later found out that this uncle was a fisherman, still stays in Pangkor Island but his children had him moved out from there to be placed in Assunta. He kept on ranting that all his life, he never entered a hospital and how his children scolded him for it.

The bed directly opposite of me was this Indian guy named Mahendran aged 23 years old. He was admitted due to some lung infection (http://www.ecureme.com/emyhealth/data/Lung_Infection.asp).

Poor guy, obviously I could see him suffering. He was having bouts of chills and also vomitting at the same time. His fever never went down, always spiralling up. Most of the nights, I could see him suffering as the staff nurses came in at odd hours to take his tempreature and make him swallow all kinds of pills. He also had his blood taken out daily for testing. At first, they suspected he had dengue but turned out to be otherwise.

Bed directly opposite of me, on my right hand, was this guy aged about 26 year old, Chinese guy who works as a cook. Apparently, he was diagnoised as having Hepatitis A. For a cook to have that kind of sickness is pretty much dangerous to the people surrounding him as he can be a carrier and also infect others. As a result of that, this chap was placed in the hospital for some days now (more than a week) and what the doctors do daily is take out some blood and do testing. At the same time, to ensure he does not have any fever, if he has, it indicates that he is still not recovered as yet. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hepatitis_A

After learning so much of my immediate neighbors in this ward, I try to rest but was interrupted by this young student nurse.

"Sir, is this your first time in Assunta Hospital? enquired the young nurse.

"Yup, this is my first time" I replied, trying to cut short the conversation as I was not in the mood to entertain.

"So, you see the two door on the left and right, those are the toilets. This call button, press the red button is to call for the nurses" she explained. Later on, I learnt that this call button was my best button I had for years. I could summon these nurses to my command at the press of a button at any time of the day and they would not dare to complain.

"On this button, you can swtich on the lights, and this is the TV remote control which you can access for a nominal fee of RM10 per day. We have several channels on this network, mostly movies and news channels." she explained.
"So, would you like to rent the TV?" sounding like those hardcore direct sellers.

I thought to myself, why not? Since I might be bored shit sitting here and just sleeping, some TV might cheer me up. Since there is no WIFI available as yet in the hospitals, I might just take this opportunity to watch some TV.

As I was supposed to be going through two things tomorrow, my endoscopy and then my surgery, I was place on fasting; meaning no solid food or water. However, to clear my bowels, I had to take some food as the staff nurse asked me if I did eat anything? I told her categorically, no but I took lunch.

She went out for a while and brought in a bowl of cold plain porridge. I ate it reluctantly as it tasted bland and it has this very sick feeling in it. However, I needed to take this as I was about to take a laxative called Golytely. Its used to move the bowel so that they BO more often. When this happens, one will not want to be in my shoes as I how I felt later.
The nurse came in again, this time brought in this white bottle and poured into a cup. She said it was best to have it diluted in water as it was very salty.

"Let me try it" I asked the nurse. So, she allowed me to take a sip of it and my face changed immediately after tasting it. It was so salty, like sea water. After that, the staff nurse added some water to it and I drank it but it still felt funny. http://www.hopkinshospital.org/health_info/Womens_Health/Reading/Golytely_Bowel_Prep

http://www.mtauburn.caregroup.org/body.cfm?id=6&action=detail&AEProductID=HW_Knowledgebase&AEArticleID=hw209694

Later in evening, my brother and his family dropped by passing me the stuff I needed. They stayed on for a while but in terms of visitors volume, I salute my Indian brother opposite of me. He had the record number of visitors daily, ranging from aunties, uncles, cousins and many many more, at times it was like a social gathering around his bed. And, like all Indians, they make the most noise but I guess I'm not complaining because usually this things happen. They are just showing their concern for this poor chap.

The uncle next to me was abuzz with his daughters and his grandchildren who kept on shuffling up and down the aisle in the room. Thank goodness, they were not that loud but still you know, when you are alone in your little bed, you kinda think, wow, how nice to have a large family, so its not so quiet after all.

But, I was not alone, for a few friends did dropped by and that included Ken(http://www.kenfresh.blogspot.com/) but I was not in the mood to actually elaborate more as the effect of the laxative began to take its course. It was controlling my bowel more quickly than my mind can reinforce itself control around that region. Thus, it was a losing battle after all.

Keep on burping and like what it was meant to be, I kept on having nausea feeling. While they were talking to each other, I excuse myself to go to the toilet as I really needed to empty my bowels. I'm not sure how many times I made the pilgrimage to the seat of throne, but it was numerous to my count.

Sensing that I was not in the mood to talk, Ken and my friends excused themselves and left me. I believe the time was about 2230hours when they left. Soon the ward became quiet as the last visitors left but not for my Indian friend opposite of me. The family still stayed until I thought it was quite late.

Time: The witching hours

Thinking that my pilgrimage has ended, nope that was just the start of it. Many trips were made to the seat in the deadliest hour of the night...how many times I came out and within half way to my bed, I had to go back to it as if I was being drawn to its allure but this was not pleasure, it was PAINFUL!!!

Painful in the sense, I had nothing much to download anymore but still my bowel kept on opening and there was a time, I did not want to leave the throne. I just sat there hoping it will come out. I rested my head next to the wall but nothing moved. Thinking, perhaps this was the end of it, I moved back to my bed, inched closer to the pillow but alas, this was not to be. I had to rush back to the throne to have it eased off.

All in all, I guess there were about 10 trips of more? Lost count, totally dehydrated and no water to drink (remember I was still fasting) I crept up to my bed and thank goodness managed to sleep for a while before rudely awaken by a staff nurse with an attending doctor besides her.

"Sir, sorry to disturb you, but we need to put you on the IVU drip. The doctor here will insert this needled which will act as a conducit for the drips to flow through" she explained in a hushed voice. I allowed her to do it as I had no more strength to protest nor fight anymore. I was just like a test animal being poked here and there. No sooner than that, she left me with the drips on.

Thought, ok, worse has gone, I went to sleep. No, again, I was awaken by another staff nurse with this Dr. Singh with her.

"We have come to take your blood now" the staff nurse said. "We need to test your blood" she added.

Dr. Singh with his giant syringe came and tried to draw blood from one of my veins but this particular vein was not co-operating. At last some part of my blood was forming a resistant group.
Dr. Singh then went to my right hand and tried to draw some blood from there. At last it came out, so, I guess my "piece de resistant" was weak at this juncture.

"If we cannot get from your veins, we will have to draw from your veins which is located at your calves" joked Dr. Singh to me.

I looked at him, my mind F*** off, I don't need a Jerry Seinfield stand up during this witching hour. Instead of an array of expletives, I just nodded and smiled not agreeing but just being diplomatic.

They left, I slept...but not before being awaken by the church bells. It was already 0600 hours, the first mass of the day is going to start in a short while. My bed was next to the Assumption church, which at that time, I felt a tinge of blessed because not many sick people can be near to a church and draw some spiritual strenght from it.

The bells began to toil even louder and each time it toiled, I began to ponder, wow, my journey is really begining. I'm not sure what will happen next? What will they find out in me? What will the tests come out? Will it be bad? Will it be bad? I don't know, I'm just praying that things will be good and positive because when one is really down and out like me, a lot of things can play out and this affects your rational thinking.
So another day has dawned and another journey is about to begin.....

Pain, Pus, Scopes, Surgery and Rehabilitation - A JOURNEY REVEALED. (part One)

The whole Raya period was a painful experience for me and notwithstanding the fact that I was so much in wanting to taste the rendang, ketupat, serunding etc etc...I had to forgo this one this year. All the time, I was like spending at home, no mood to go out. The mere movement of my feet was so unbearable, it was painful, a pain that originates from the rectum area. Its like a piece of "thing" poking in to it and what you feel is a funny feeling of wanting to shit and urinate at the same time. Not the other "feeling" which some may attest to it, no way JOSE!

It affected me all day more so when I was about to sleep. I could not stand it anymore and vowed that on the next working day i.e. October 26, 2006, I will head on to Assunta http://www.assunta.com.my/index.html.

So begins my little journey of pain and more pain and the subsequent of easing of it.

Dateline: October 26, 2006
Place: Specialist Clinic, Assunta Hospital
Time : 1430 hours

I called up earlier to book an appointment with my specialist doctor, a certain Mr. MMS. Painful as it was, I knew I was to be admitted to the hospital that day itself.

Painfully, I made my way to Room 8 where the specialist was based. The nurse who took my number looked at me pitifully and managed to shove my number ahead from another patient (who was looking more healthy than me).

"Mr Coolgardy, the doctor will see you now" commanded the nurse to me and gesturing me to enter the room before the other guy realizes what was happening.

Going in, I spoke in a hushed voice complaining that my pain did not go away, and that a few days ago, I went to a GP to get some daflon pills.

The pills only acted as a relief but it did not actually pull away the pain nor did it end it like I was hoping it will be.

"Go up to the examining bed, and let's have a look at it" said Mr. MMS.

Dutifully, I strutted to the bed, knowing well of what I was about to receive, I took off my pants and also my underwear and waited for Mr MMS to come in.

He came in, with his surgical gloves began to examine my anal rectum area.

"See this bumps over here, these are what is causing the pain for me" I retorted. I just could not bear it anymore, I had to pinpoint to him where it was.

"Ah, yes, it looks swollen, ok let's get you admitted today" said MMS.

"As you need to undergo a scope too, you will have to fast; will also give you some potion to clear up your stomach and colon and also at the same time to put you on a IUV drip" explained MMS.

Slowly, the anal probed ended, I put on my what was left of the clothing that was uncovered, made my way to his table and began to see him write up some prescriptions for the nurse to follow up.

All in all, it took less than 10 minutes, and there I was being ushered in a wheel chair, to the Admission Dept. My brother who accompanied me took down all the things that I wanted, asked him to go back and come back in the later part of the evening to bring my belongings.

While waiting for the company's insurance agent to come back on the guarantee letter, the staff at the Admissions will only do so when they have that letter. Minutes passed and minutes became almost 40 minutes, and I asked the Admission staff what was going on?

"We are waiting for your Insurance company to fax over the letter" replied this nice Indian chap.

Not being the mood of waiting, I called up the Insurance company and with a stern voice asked them...

"What is holding up my application? Is there a problem? If not, why are you guys making me wait in this pain???"

The lady at the other end replied calmly with a heavily Chinese accented English... "Oh, we are going to fax over in 10 minutes, don't worry".

Yeah, don't worry, tell it to a patient who is about to collapse any moment. But, like what they told me, the letter did go through and I thought that was the end of my problems. However, this was not be to so.

"Sir, at the moment, we have only single room available and also 4 to a room. Two to a room is all taken up at the moment, so that leaves only 2 choices" explained the nice Indian chap.

"How much is the single and how much is the 4 to a room bed?" I enquired. Reason being, I wanted to know if my Insurance will cover the single, and duh, it did not, so no choice it was either the 2 to a room or the 4 to a room. As 2 was not available, I had to take the 4, so ok, I thought that was the end of it, but then no, as later I found out, the bed was not ready yet, and will take another hour for it to be ready.

"Huh, how much longer must I wait?" I asked myself. The Admission chap seeing that I was not in very good spirits, decided to allow me to rest in the A&E bed. I had no choice so I took up the suggestion and ventured to the A&E room. In it was a cacophony of noise made out of little boys and girls reeling in pain as the nurses and doctors administered to the best of ability the care intended for them. This also made me wonder, I was in some paederitic ward?

Place: 4th Floor, MAWAR Ward, ROOM 6 Bed 3

I guess it was almost about 1900 hours that I was finally wheeled in to my bed. As soon, as I reached the bed (which was going to be my next home for the past 9 days), a chripy nurse came up and asked me some questions.

"Sir, is this your first time to Assunta" she asked.

"Yup" I replied.

"So, the toilet is there at the end, here is the button to call the nurse, press the red one, and here is the cabinet to put in your stuff. If you want to watch the TV, you can rent it for RM10 per day, we have several channels operated by MITV" explained the chirpy chip chip nurse.

"Thought to myself, yeah why not, put me on the TV list 'cos at least I will have some entertainment to amuse me when I'm bored and nothing really nothing really to do"

So, the chirpy student nurse went out, came in again and got me to sign off some forms first one is to consent them for surgery, second for the scope and then the 3rd one, for the rental of the TV.

After that, another nurse came in. This time a staff nurse, meaning a more senior nurse came to attend to me. She asked me if I had any food as she wanted me to swallow some pills...I told her, I have yet to eat anything and then she went to ask for a bowl of plain porridge for me. It tasted horrible...bland and nothing in this world that you will want to eat. But, for the sake of the pills, I had to swallow it.

Immediately, she came in again, this time with a bottle and asked me to drink it all up.

"It's a bit salty you know" said the nurse.

"Nope, I don't know" I replied her. "Never been to this situation before, so I will not know. But, I guess now I will know" teasing her.

I took a sip, YUCKS!!! It did taste horrible...something like sea water. So, the nurse mixed it with some water and I gulped like taking a pot shot. The immediate effect was not apparent until very very much later which I must say it felt like living hell.

Ken camed over to visit me that evening, but I was already in that stage where the salty water was making its effect. I constantly burped and was like going through some roller coaster, my stomach that was. Sensing that I was like not in the mood to entertain, Ken and a few of my friends decided to leave me alone...and thus, my journey of suffering begins.

Place: Mawar Ward, Bed 6-3 (between the witching hours) - toilet

My stomach began to grumble and the next thing, my colon began to take control of my brain. Instantaneous, I was like running to the toilet at all times. Sat on the throne of power, out came the excesses of the body and thought it was all over...for the time being. Within minutes after creeping into my bed, my lower part began to take control again. Out of bed, rushed back to the toilet (and all this time, my pain was growing from the inflammation) and sat on the throne. This time, it was fluids...OMGosh, when will all this end?

It never, came to a point, I just sat there at the throne waiting for the next download to take place but none did ever came. I refused to budge from it, instead resting one part of my head on the side bar of the toilet. Minutes passed, and well, I thought to myself, ok finally it has ended. I cleaned up, walked back to my bed, and thought, finally I can rest.

Upon crawling in bed, and rested within seconds, the growling pain began to take place. This time it was furious and was coming like a 747 jet ...pardon the pun, it was that fast. I literally dashed into the toilet and out came...*** not telling *** too much information already.

Finally it did end but the time I guess was almost 3 in the morning. I managed to catch some winks before being rudely awaken by a staff nurse and this Singh doctor. They were there to take my blood.

"Sir, we are here to take some blood samples for testing" the nurse said in a hushed voice. I'm not sure if the whole night of me rushing in and out of the toilet and the constant flushing had actually made my other room mates sleep but I guess, I did not care much at that point for already I was feeling so sore from the sitting, running and the downloads. I was literally drained and now, they want to drain me of my blood?

The Singh doctor tried to get my veins to pull out the blood but he failed to get any from my left hand, thus, he said he was going to go for the right arm instead. If that fails, he told me jokingly "we will have to extract it out near your leg" - bad taste to me, I was like can you F*** off! But, already drained, no more energy to fight, I just allowed them the privilege of my right arm...and thank heavens, the blood did flow out.

"You have very healthy blood" explained Dr. Singh.

"Huh? What do you mean by that? How can one tell if the blood is healthy? I asked.

"The color and the texture of it" replied Dr. Singh.

Wow, first time someone actually commented that I had healthy blood. Ok, maybe this doctor is not so bad after all, or maybe he was just trying to make conversations with me?

Off they went and before I knew it, again the staff nurse came in with another doctor, a lady doctor this time.

"Sir, we are here to put you on the IVU drip" the nurse said in a hushed voice again.

"Will this hurt?" I asked the doctor.

"Just a little bit, nothing more like an ant bite" replied Madam Doctor. Yup, she was right, it was not that bad. After that, the staff nurse came with the drips and looking at it, I really had no more energy in me. I just fell asleep until woken up by the morning church bells toiling around 0600 hours calling the faithful for early morning Mass.

My bed was just next to the Church of the Assumption. http://www.assumptionpj.org/

To me, I thought it was a blessing to be so close to a church in times of difficulties. However, as the morning breaks open, so the next part of the journey begins....