Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Is it a blessing or is it a bane...? You decide...


Here I am sitting down at my workstation and wondering when the system will be up. I just got into work today after being on leave yesterday and this has to greet me? I’m contemplating whether this is indeed a blessing or a curse…whichever which, I think I will just think of it being part of life. Neither a blessing nor a curse, just hang in there and live by it? If I do that, do I submit unconsciously to the thought of submission or should I question the rational for this to happen? As you may notice, I have so much to talk about now, since there is a vacuum right here, not being able to be productive, my mind floats to other places to think of this??

Having said that, this blog which I’m now attempting to resurrect, there have been numerous incidents that have had happened. There are many things to share but I guess I should not overload in one upload, rather take the easy way out and tell them as days go by…if that you the reader have the utmost patience to do so. With this, I humbly seek your kind consideration to perhaps allow me to speak gibberish in this blog and if they make sense to you, perhaps seek an understanding that you may agree or disagree with me by adding in your precious comments.

The latest updates I want to talk about this time round are the fact that I have met 2 guys…totally different in character and thoughts. However, the fact remains is that both of them are like 3 decades away from me! Yes, you have heard it right, they are younger, and case #1 is a 18year old, while case #2 is 21. For case #1, the circumstances leading to this meeting was held in the most unmentionable way, it was by way of a bored afternoon spent at the spa, and that was how this little liaison started.
Case# 2 is someone whom I have met like 2 years ago, went out for a dinner date and when he told me that his preferences was for taller guys, I thought maybe he was being a bit superficial because that was his only requirement. I thought it being quite unlikely to continue from there, wished him all the best and just kept a minimal of our conversations via the MSN by the standard hellos and byes.

So, you the reader may think what’s with the point of me bringing up these 2 case subjects? Actually, if I were to ask myself, I would not know it too but for the sake of wanting to share what’s in my life now, I thought it would be better for the readers to give me an opinion or in other words, judge me and guide me of what is going in my life?

Case# 1, shall we christened him as Xiao Fu (XF), is a fellow who works part time being a masseur at one of the spas located in the gardens of the Tun. Actually, I have noticed his picture for some time now as I regularly get updates of this spa from them and based on the gallery shown, he was someone that I thought looked interesting and decided to request for this services. Perhaps it was the will of the Heavens that I should meet XF that afternoon, when the attendant told me that he was available. So imagine my anticipation as I approached the spa and got down to “business”. I was ushered in this little treatment room with a bed, a couch and outside was the outdoor shower facilities. There was a towel that was placed at the end of the couch. I picked that up and began to undress myself. I wrapped the towel around me and waited. The waiting was incredulously torturing. Every seconds, you may wonder what may walk in, because in all my experiences, one can never trust the pictures posted on the gallery. There is always the element of photo shop being blatantly abused when trying to fix a picture, so I thought. I decided to walk out to inspect the outdoor shower area; it was done quite brilliantly so I thought. Then, there was a knock on the door and it was my therapist. He walked in, all 180cm of him and was lanky to begin with and that long hair, perhaps it’s a phase. So, he directed me to the shower area and he began to undress himself too. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a pair of hands began to hit the most sensitive part of my body, my stomach and knowing that I have yet to develop that 6 level packs, I began to feel a tad shy of him caressing that area.

The whole ritual continued with him giving me a wash up and the moment he began to move upwards, downwards and to an area which is extra sensitive, I began to feel a hardon coming up. I had thought hard to think of other things to avert this feeling but could not as my therapist too had an incredible hardon pressing against my body. This continued on for some time and before you knew it, it was time to face him to the face as all this while, my back was against him. As I gazed at his eyes, I could not help but allow myself to feel slutty and have my lips touched his. I must admit I initiated all of this action and a kiss turned out to be a frenchy one and was clearly intense

Thereafter, he led me in to the room, and as I laid down thinking of the wonderful pampering I will get, honest to be said, I got more than I bargained for. XF was really sensual with his movements and the way he went about to give me the treatment was really out of this world. I cannot think of any other therapist that would have gone down to such details. Well, as they said, one thing led to another and before I got to say “eureka” there he was already trying to initiate to “enter” me! I avoided him coming into me but finally, I relented as he was too good and his skills for a young guy, was really amazing! He possessed a rather odd looking weapon but nonetheless, it was nothing that I have not seen. I took it like a man and the more he did it albeit the painfulness, it actually felt good! Being a top myself I thought this young chap exceeded his skills to the max. I guess that afternoon; I have totally surrendered to the warm embrace of his skills. Another thing about him, when I complained that it was painful and asked him to move in slowly, he did so with much geniality, for a young dude, he was totally sensitive unlike some, which I know, are brash!

You could have guessed it, there was no proper massage treatment; what I had was an intense sexual act that afternoon. After we had finished with the task, he asked if he could hitch a ride from me. From a ride, it went to dinner, yes not the smart thing to do but I was intrigued to interview this XF. So, we settled at a restaurant in 1U, sat down and there he began to pour out to me his life story. He had 3 boyfriends before, and his last one was like 2 weeks ago. Alarm bells began to sound immediately when he said he broke off 2 weeks ago, yeah guys, rebound! I thought to myself, better keep my distance from him, as I could not afford to have an emotional tidal wave hitting me! In summary, he is an intelligent dude but comes from a broken up family, raised by his mother (dad walked out of the family), is still vague of what love is, kid like attitude and best of all, thinks that he knows best in all things (well not all, there are certain things he is still raw). I began to feel a sense of compassion for XF but I know that this is wrong, because knowing myself, to allow me to develop feelings for a kid yet a masseur is so totally awry! If you think that this was the last time we kept in touch, you are wrong my dear readers. For the minute my mind decides to say NO, my fingers began to text him and asked if he still wants to meet up! Talk about hypocrisy, assuring oneself but doing the opposite of it!

But, now, I’m more certain that my feelings for case#1 is one sided, I guess. I’m so sucked up to this that I give myself false hopes to think that I might be able to change him or influence him, but the more I spend time with him, suffice to say, I think he is taking advantage of me and the fact that I’m the one who buys dinner all the time. I’m at a loss…not that I cannot afford the dinners, but its more likely towards the emotional exchanges that might fall on me, and that these exchanges will only result in being one sided…

2 comments:

Reszurrecdito M. d'Saintner said...

I guess you are too emotionally charged. Take it easy man, things will come its way.

Regards,
DTM.

bitchyboo said...

you know what, i think i met that guy with the height fetish last year. he was really all over me (i'm 6ft) but his immaturity turned me off because at the end he only wanted sex from me!! ugh.